CDV 17-3

Forgetting You

bhuliya tomare, samsare asiya,
peye nana-vidha byatha
tomara carane, asiyachi ami,
bolibo duḥkhera katha

[O Lord, having forgotten You and come to this material world, I have experienced a host of sins and sorrows. Now I approach Your lotus feet and submit my tale of woe.]

janani jathare, chilama jakhona,
bisama bandhana-pase
eka-bara prabhu! dekha diya more,
vancile e dina dase

[While I was bound up tightly in the unbearable confines of my mother's womb, O Lord, You once revealed Yourself before me. After appearing briefly, You abandoned this poor servant of Yours.]

takhona bhavinu, janama paiya,
koribo bhajana tava
janama hoilo, paḍi' maya-jale,
na hoilo jnana-lava

[At that moment I thought, "After my birth this time, I will surely worship You with undivided attention." But alas, after taking birth I fell into the entangling network of worldly illusions; thus I possessed not even a drop of true knowledge.]

adarera chele, sva-janera kole,
hasiya katanu kala
janaka janani-snehete bhuliya,
samsara lagilo bhalo

[As a dear son fondled in the laps of attentive relatives, I passed my time smiling and laughing. The affection of my father and mother helped me forget You still more, and I began to think that the material world was a very nice place.]

krame dina dina, balaka hoiya,
bhelinu balaka-saha
ara kichu dine, jnana upajilo,
patha poḍi ahar-ahaḥ

[Day by day I gradually grew into a young boy and began playing with other boys. Soon my powers of understanding emerged, so I diligently studied my school lessons every day.]

vidyara gaurave, bhrami' dese dese,
dhana uparjana kori
sva-jana palana, kori eka-mane,
bhulinu tomare, hari!

[Proud of my accomplished education, I later traveled from place to place and earned much wealth. Thereby maintaining my family with undivided attention, I forgot You, O Lord Hari!]

bardhakye ekhona, bhakativinoda,
kandiya katara ati
na bhajiya tore, dina brtha gelo,
ekhona ki have gati?

[Now in old age, this Bhaktivinoda very sadly weeps as death approaches. I failed to worship You, O Lord, and instead passed my days in vain. What will be my fate now?]

[18:10]

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