independence
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a woman is never independent. She must remain the property of the father while she is not married, and she must remain the property of the husband until she is elderly and has grown-up children of her own. In old age, when the husband has taken sannyā The word amba is significant. A father sometimes addresses his daughter in affection as "Mother" and sometimes as "my darling." The feeling of separation occurs because until the daughter is married she remains the daughter of the father, but after her marriage she is no longer claimed as a daughter in the family; she must go to the husband's house, for after marriage she becomes the property of the husband. According to Manu-samhita, a woman is never independent. She must remain the property of the father while she is not married, and she must remain the property of the husband until she is elderly and has grown-up children of her own. In old age, when the husband has taken sannyasa and left home, she remains the property of the sons. A woman is always dependent, either upon the father, husband or elderly sons. That will be exhibited in the life of Devahūti. Devahūti's father handed over responsibility for her to the husband, Kardama Muni, and, in the same way, Kardama Muni also left home, giving the responsibility to his son, Kapiladeva. This narration will describe these events one after another.
(More...) Imported quote 12826 The ideal husband and wife relationship is very nicely described in this statement. Kardama Muni gave Devahūti all sorts of comforts in his duty as a husband, but he was not at all attached to his wife. As soon as his son Kapiladeva was grown up, Kardama at once left all family connection. Similarly, Devahūti was the daughter of a great king, Svayambhuva Manu, and was qualified and beautiful, but she was completely dependent on the protection of her husband. According to Manu, women, the fair sex, should not have independence at any stage of life. In childhood a woman must be under the protection of the parents, in youth she must be under the protection of the husband, and in old age she must be under the protection of the grown-up children. Devahūti demonstrated all these statements of the Manu-samhita in her life: as a child she was dependent on her father, later she was dependent on her husband, in spite of her opulence, and she was later on dependent on her son Kapiladeva.
(More...) Imported quote 18028 So this Kardama Muni did it. Because he was a yogi, he strictly followed the principle. So as soon as Kapiladeva was grown up, the mother, Devahūti, was given in His charge and Kardama Muni left home. Therefore it is said that pitari prasthite aranyam matuḥ priya-cikirsaya. Now, it is the duty of the son. Women should be under the protection. In the Manu-samhita it is said that woman should not be given freedom. Na stri svatantryam arhati. They cannot properly utilize freedom. It is better to remain dependent. That is very good. Independent woman cannot be happy. That's a fact. We have seen in the Western countries, on..., in the name of independence, so many women are unhappy. So that is not recommended in the Vedic civilization and on the varnasrama-dharma. So therefore the mother, Devahūti, was given under the charge of his [her] grown-up son, Kapiladeva. And Kapiladeva was fully cognizant that He has to take care of His mother. Therefore matuḥ priya-cikirsaya. It is the duty of the father to protect the girl very nicely. Women are very delicate. They should be given... So during childhood, until she attains, I mean to say, youthhood, puberty, the girl is under the protection of the father. Still, in India, the father takes care of the girl until she is married to a suitable boy. The father takes. And then the young husband takes care of the young girl, wife, and then some children are born, and then grown up. Suppose a man marries at the age of twenty... That is, I mean, the highest. A boy is married not later than twenty-five years. And the girl is not married not later than sixteen years. That is the system. So a sixteen-year girl and twenty-five-year boy, if the child is born, then when the man is fifty years old, the child becomes twenty-five years old. So he can take charge.
(More...) Imported quote 20666 Please accept my blessings. I beg to acknowledge receipt of your letter dated 3rd July. You are exactly correct when you write that Krishna has benedicted you with a first class husband. In Vedic society no girl was allowed to remain independent and unmarried. Independence for women means they become like prostitutes, struggling to capture some man who will take care of her. In this way the so called independent woman has to work very hard to make herself attractive by artificially wearing cosmetics-mini skirts and so many other things. Formerly the girl would be married to a suitable boy at a very early age, say six years old. But although a girl was married early she did not stay with her husband immediately, but was gradually trained in so many ways how to cook, clean and serve her husband in so many ways-up until the time of her puberty. So all the time there was no anxiety because a girl would know-I have got a husband, and the boy would know I have got this girl as my wife. Therefore when the boy and girl would come of age there was no chance of illicit sex-life. And the pychology is the first boy that a girl accepts in marriage, that girl will completely give her heart to, and this attachment on the girls side for her husband becomes more and more strong, thus if a girls gets a good husband-one who has accepted a bona fide spiritual master and is firmly fixed up in his service, automatically the wife of such a good husband inherits all the benefits of his spiritual advancement. So you are fortunate. Go on in this present attitude, serve you husband always and in this way your life will be perfect, and together husband and wife go back home-Back to Godhead. I hope you are well. Your ever well wisher,
(More...)A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Imported quote 24084 In this verse the word pumscali refers to a woman who is easily carried away by men. Such a woman is never to be trusted. Unfortunately, in the present age, women are never controlled. According to the directions of the sastras, women are never to be given freedom. When a child, a woman must be strictly controlled by her father. When she is young, she must be strictly controlled by her husband, and when she is old, she must be controlled by her elderly sons. If she is given independence and allowed to mingle unrestrictedly with men, she will be spoiled. A spoiled woman, being manipulated by paramours, might even kill her husband. This example is given here because a yogi desiring to get free from material conditions must always keep his mind under control. Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Thakura used to say that in the morning our first business should be to beat the mind with shoes a hundred times, and, before going to bed, to beat the mind a hundred times with a broomstick. In this way one's mind can be kept under control. An uncontrolled mind and an unchaste wife are the same. An unchaste wife can kill her husband at any time, and an uncontrolled mind, followed by lust, anger, greed, madness, envy and illusion, can certainly kill the yogi. When the yogi is controlled by the mind, he falls down into the material condition. One should be very careful of the mind, just as a husband should be careful of an unchaste wife.
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